


It’s Getting Bad Again

by Monsieur_Grenouille



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Intrusive Thoughts, Number Five | The Boy Needs A Hug, Other, Paranoia, Protective Klaus Hargreeves, brother cuddles because I said so, klaus has ADHD (implied)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-04
Updated: 2020-11-04
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:40:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,091
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26981551
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Monsieur_Grenouille/pseuds/Monsieur_Grenouille
Summary: Number Five has a mental breakdown. He hears voices coming from his paranoia, making him lose himself. Luckily, he has a brother who hears voices too.
Relationships: Number Five | The Boy & Klaus Hargreeves
Comments: 8
Kudos: 138





	It’s Getting Bad Again

**Author's Note:**

> I made this because Number Five is someone I feel like I connect with on a personal level. I relate to him. And I think he would have depression, due to his experiences and unresolved trauma.

Number Five held his knees to his chest, rocking back and forth in his armchair. The door was locked behind him. Why? Because he didn’t want people to come in and see him crying. Tears streamed down his face as thoughts pounded in his head. 

“They’re coming for you,” one voice said. 

Five shook his head. “Who? Hazel and Cha-Cha aren’t coming after me anymore.”

”There’s someone new.” 

“No there isn’t! I’m on break.” 

“That’s why they’ll strike. Because you won’t expect it.” 

Number Five squeezed his eyes shut. _Don’t listen to it, don’t listen to it,_ he told himself. It’d only hurt more if he did. The candlelight flickered in front of him. Oh, how badly he wanted to set himself on fire. He would feel the tickle of the flames on his jacket, soaking through to his skin, and burning him. He’d burn slowly to death, never to feel a single thing ever again. The amount of money he’d pay to be numb... it’s concerning. He reached out, picked up the candle, and almost set it to his torso before freezing. “No!” he shouted. He blew out the candle and flung it across the room. It hit the window. 

Five let the thoughts sink in. “I almost set myself on fire,” he whispered, breathless. “I almost killed myself.” 

“And yet, you stopped,” a voice in his head buzzed, “What made you think you deserve to live?”

“N-NOTHING!” He shouted, “I know that I don’t deserve to live. It’s just that it would’ve set this really nice house on fire.” Five looked around. “I want to kill myself, trust me. But they’d worry.”

“Who? Who would worry?”

“M-My family.”

“Oh, the same way they _cared_ when Dad died.”

Five started scratching at his arms and chewing on his tie, signs that he was anxious. “P-Please... stop trying to talk to me. I know you’re not real, just...” 

He heard a gentle knock at the door. Five flinched — someone had heard him fretting. “C-Come in,” he whispered softly. The doorknob turned, and in came Klaus. He was in pajamas, which meant that he was wearing a cozier crop top than the one he had on during the day. All the eyeliner had been wiped from his eyes. The two brothers stared at each other. Five was a mess, breathing quickly and still munching at his tie.

“Well, this is humanizing,” Klaus said to break the silence. 

Five pretended to not know. “What’s humanizing?” he asked semi-calmly. 

Klaus sat in the leather chair next to Five’s and crossed his legs. His head propped onto his hands. “You,” he said, “You were crying. Having a panic attack, I suppose.” 

Five’s face burned pink. “That’s not what that was. I’m just a bit sleep-deprived. I was starting to hear things, and overall it must mean that I need to sleep.” He leaned his head back against the chair. “No need to worry about me, Klaus.” 

“And yet, I do.” Klaus said it without thinking. He had a big heart that worried about all his siblings the same way. He knew that he’d still be able to see them once they’re dead, but he’d be the only person they could talk to and even Ben gets tired of it. “Five, I heard you talking to yourself.” 

Five clenched his fists. “I wasn’t talking to _myself,_ ” he stressed, “I heard _voices_ and so I _responded_ to them.” 

Klaus shook his head. “Unless you know where the voices came from, you’re talking to yourself. That’s something I learned a long time ago. You can put your guard down, you know? I’m not going to hurt you.” He reached out and put his hand on Five’s knee. “I want to help you.” 

“Please stop touching me,” Five whispered tensely. Klaus obeyed. Once things settled down, Five kept talking. “The voices were telling me to get rid of myself,” he confessed. “They were very loud, and very convincing. I wanted to actually kill myself in that moment, you know? It was just one of those adrenaline rushes where nothing makes sense and you just want it to stop no matter what it takes.” 

Klaus whimpered softly before sitting up like a human. “So, what did you do?” 

Five pointed to the candle over on the floor by the window. “I tried to light myself on fire. Salem-Witch-Trial style.” He made eye contact with Klaus, who was appalled. His eyes were wide with fear. Five chuckled to himself and shook his head. “You think I’m crazy,” he said. Klaus tried to object, but Five snapped, “It wasn’t a question. I _know_ you think I’m crazy.” 

Klaus stood up out of his chair. He sauntered over to the candle on the floor, opened the window, and dropped the candle all the way down to the streets. “Problem solved,” he said, “you don’t have to think about the candle anymore.” He walked to Five and cuddled next to him. His arms fit nicely around Five’s little waist. 

Five felt like screaming. “Don’t you fucking dare touch me you bag of cow shit!” he snarled. He wrestled in Klaus’s grip. “Let go of me or I’ll kill you! And don’t get the idea that I won’t. I’m going to rip you from limb to–“ 

Klaus interrupted him calmly, “You’re not that tough.” 

Five stared at him. “I beg your goddamn pardon?” 

“You wouldn’t kill me. I’m trying to help you.” Klaus held onto Five and pressed down on the time-traveler’s head with one hand. “This is called sensory pressure. Mom used to do it all the time to me when I got excited or when Ben got anxious. It’s just very calming.” He trapped Five’s little frame onto the chair. Five tried to squirm free, but Klaus held him in place. “Just relax,” he murmured, “Let me help you. Say anything you need to say.” 

Five sighed and relaxed his muscles after a few minutes. The pressure did actually feel nice. It was like a weighted blanket that knew which places to focus on. Speaking his mind, Five said, “I wish I could talk to Delores about this.” 

Klaus smiled. “Yeah, she looked nice. Do you miss her?” 

“Sometimes. It’s best to let go of some things while still remembering them.” He yawned, feeling drowsy from the pressure. Klaus was truly the master of managing panic attacks. “Should I just talk to you when I start hearing voices?” 

Klaus nodded. “No offense to our siblings, but I’m the only one who’d understand you.”


End file.
